It’s a subject tackled by guests on this week’s , which brought together people single by choice and circumstance to determine why increasing numbers of Australians are living their lives without a significant other.
With the proliferation of online dating services, do we just have too much choice?
“When we used to date when we were in our 20s like it was all just a mystery and that was sort of the excitement of it,” he says.
“Whereas now with the dating apps, it's sort of like the check list scenario: people are being crossed off, and I know sort of a lot of it's probably fairly valid stuff, but before you even get the chance to see them in person.” An audience member agreed that for all online dating’s possibilities, it could be limiting in finding the right partner. and being able to narrow it down from the start really denies yourself the opportunity to grow through the relationship and to have a meaningful relationship,” he said.
“I think because [decision making in dating apps] is so fast paced we've conditioned people to just wonder, ‘what's next? “I think a lot of people my age are concerned that the person that they're on a date with is thinking, ‘is there something better? ’” “So true,” agreed Allison Norris, a 28 year-old single woman living in Melbourne. They were pretty open about it.” In the face of so much choice, users aren’t afraid to be picky and quick in their decisions – perhaps, somewhat paradoxically, contributing to singledom numbers.
For Thomas Materia, 28, the transparency of dating apps allows him to swiftly sort through a plethora of choices, where values, taste and looks are already on the table.
Hugh Mackay, a social researcher specialising in this area, speculates these trends might be part of a bigger social shift valorising individualism.
The Bible says "Let us love one another, for love comes from God.
“I find from the investigations that I've done with Tinder and the guys that I've asked, they will swipe yes to everybody until they find someone that matches,” she says.
“Whereas women I find are a lot pickier and most of the men that I've spoken to about it are pretty open about saying that they will just say yes until they get a yes.” Warren Giffin, a 53 year-old school teacher laments the mystery of older forms of dating, where a potential match wasn’t ruled out so quickly.
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