How can you get to know someone that deeply and intimately over days or weeks? Our friendship, our courtship, our getting to know each other? And now, one year later almost to the day when we had our first date, we’re almost to the point where we can be together again.What happened to taking your time developing strong, intimate, caring relationships? Because taking your time will actually confirm that you’re compatible, or let you move out of the relationship with dignity. I must say: we were both scared, both worried that our forced separation would break us up.After all, many relationships that start off too fast can end up leading to heartache and heartbreak because you and your partner took major relationship steps before really getting to know each other.However, by taking things slow, your partner is hoping to build an even stronger foundation on which your budding and blooming connection can grow.And in order for your partner to be truly comfortable, ready and willing to hit these self-proclaimed monumental relationship moments, taking things slow enables these occurrences to happen when the timing is right in every respect.
There’s a little something that makes you want to get to know them better. Don’t sacrifice your happiness for the promise of a quick fix. My (obviously limited) experience has shown me that those crazy intense relationship debuts end up puttering out really fast. But when I took it slow, when I took my time, like with E., it has been more enduring and more reliable.
When did we let our quick-fix culture mess up with our dating life?
Maybe it’s the influence of Tinder, or more generally our “buy it now” culture, but I feel like there’s an increasing pressure on dating to have immediate results.
An additional motivation behind taking things slow may have to do with your partner’s feelings toward you and/or toward dating and relationships in general.
Specifically, your partner may not be fully able or ready to move your relationship forward at a faster pace because he or she may still be unsure about what he or she’s looking for at this point in his or her life.